Christopher Pratt (cpratt) wrote,
Christopher Pratt
cpratt

Shopping

Although I've just spent the day home sick, lying in bed, trying to sleep, I finally have come to the realization that I absolutely have to drag my ass out of the house and go shopping. Why? Well... there's nothing worth eating here. No soup, no crackers, no toast, nothing. There's some polenta, apples, chard, potatoes, oatmeal, granola, Jiffy mix, and that's just about it. I spent a good ten minutes staring into the fridge and left empty handed. OK, so I ate the last two Eggo waffles still partially frozen, but that was the last of it. There's some frozen seafood in there but I'm throwing that out... I seem to remember buying it last May, and I doubt it's still good. [We tried to eat a frozen lamb roast last night, but it had gone bad... is there anything more disgusting than only realizing with your sixth bite that the meat you're eating is rotten?]

So, it's off to the store. Now, I'm no fan of shopping. I settled into a comfortable routine in the early 1990s, and it's been downhill ever since. Just as I can no longer buy Levi's 501s cut the way I like, and just as Hanes stopped making their underwear the way I like, Trader Joe's has conspired against me as well. There's no more kung pao chicken, no more Werner Heisenberg coffee. Over time, as they migrate to an ever more hippie-drenched selection of goods, I feel shut out. [The last time I was there I remember seeing ORGANIC TAMPONS, for God's sake.] Heck, even their frozen pizza selection has faded from interest... no more gorgonzola or Thai chicken pizza. Instead, all they have is disgusting organic crap from California and/or tiny pizzas for children. The cool Italian stuff is missing... oh, but wait, sometimes they have gorgonzola and pear pizza, which is just close enough to get your hopes up, but just wrong enough to majorly disappoint.

But I digress. No time for TJ's today; it's off to Albertson's, which, let's admit it, sucks. It's tacky, smells funny, and generally unpleasant. However, it's less than a mile away from my house, and I'm sick. So, I need to go get the basic sick foods: soup, crackers, white bread for toast, juice, and a donut. Then, it'll be off up the street to Himitsu Teriyaki, home of the scrummy $10 complete dinner set. Then, finally, I can come home, eat, and fall asleep again. I hate sick days.

Oh, and I almost forgot: it looks like sinnabor will be moving in with us soon, so I'd better get some Brian chow as long as I'm at the store... Velveeta [or is that Cheez Whiz?], tater tots, macaroni and cheese, cheap beer, and... um... damn, wish I'd paid better attention to the contents of his fridge. What else am I forgetting? Dr. Pepper? Mountain Dew? Filet mignon wrapped in bacon?
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  • It's July 2013.

    Remember when I wrote a lot on LiveJournal? Yeah, me neither.

  • Steve

    I'm not surprised by Jobs' death, and of course my inner cynic wants to blame homeopathy or whatever the hell it was he was into; an anecdote that…

  • Wein Keller

    It took ten days to clear Canadian customs and make it to San Diego, but Dan just installed the replacement thermostat for our crappy wine cabinet…